Words flow in and out of fashion. One of the more popular right now is the word and concept of ‘tribe’.
You may hear it associated with groups that align with or cut across cultural or societal categories. The identity of a ‘tribe’ may come from a long tradition, or be found in a company or even engineered through a similar liking of a product or way of life…
What does ‘tribe’ mean to the subconscious and why would it be handy to know? Are we looking for connection, or something else, when looking for a tribe – how can we locate the one that works the best for us?
What’s in a tribe?
Historically, a tribe was a collection of individuals who stayed together for survival – food provision, reproduction, safety – yet reaped the benefits of the collective in the way of belonging and interaction. Connection with others has been shown to extend the quality and quantity of life, so community should not be dismissed as a ‘nice to have, but not important’ thing.
A tribe can create a common identity. Surfers, for example, share a lifestyle which includes speech and fashion choices that differentiate them from others. Industries with three-letter anachronisms (TLAs) can indicate who is ‘in the know’ and who is not.
When tribes can serve needs and desires, great. It is wonderful to know that others ‘get’ us. It can often be much more comfortable and easy in the way we think, feel or work together. The mind likes things ‘like’ us – and can be more familiar and faster in processing in this aligned environment.
However, when we pit ‘us’ against ‘them’, our tribal settings can create an ecosystem that excludes or rejects outside perspectives or ideals. Because the subconscious mind automates belief structures, anything that falls outside that order is perceived as ‘wrong’.
This will often activate a defensive protocol, which means we create ways to defend our way of being or justify our approach. We’ve seen this in political debates, when extreme positions are taken to differentiate rather than finding commonalities between ‘warring’ tribes.
Do we all have to get along?
Yet can we ‘war’ in peace? Are there advantages to challenge within a tribe? Charlan Nemeth, author of “In Defense of Troublemakers: The Power of Dissent in Life and Business” thinks so.
In a company of like-minded individuals, ‘groupthink’ can have us agreeing on a solution before that answer is more fully considered. Our processes, whether through education or belief, tend to run the same scenarios, and come to the same conclusions.
That’s thanks to the subconscious mind’s efficiency – it will only go the shortest thought distance to come to a conclusion, using our ‘most likely’ patterns. However, dissenters, or those who don’t manage internally in the same way, tend to challenge the status quo.
Because ‘the way we do it around here’ doesn’t apply to someone out of, or on the fringe of the tribe, more questions may be asked, more options may be considered.
This might feel uncomfortable, and tends to feel more challenging. Yet a greater diversity of ideas and viewpoints can force our subconscious and preconceived thoughts, feelings and actions into the light. As well as force us to employ a greater number of skills and attributes, we wouldn’t have to use when we follow the tribal shortcut, which gives us much more ground to explore.
Bringing individuals with differing approaches into our inner circle may slow us down a bit, but can also make the group more robust and considered in their results. So when someone in your group doesn’t agree, use it as an opportunity to test presuppositions and enhance outcomes.
The Sum of Five (Tribe of Tomorrow)
Jim Rohn is quoted as waying “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” So our tribe can reflect who we are. This can be wonderful when we are surrounded by individuals who manifest our best selves – our hopes, dreams, needs and desires.
But what if they aren’t? What if we’ve gotten ourselves into a ‘bad’ crowd? Or more correctly, a group that doesn’t support our performance or aspirations – is there any way to escape?
Sometimes *we* need to be the change we see in the world/tribe. I’ve had clients who have made transformations in their lives and have shared their new understandings and insights with their group – and the conversation and focus has shifted significantly, for good. It seems that they had become the different thinking ‘dissenter’ and had shifted the assumptions or practices the group had been working on.
There may be a need to shift our ‘surroundings’. Just like a habit that doesn’t seem to be working for us anymore, we can ‘pick up’ people who may have held an important role for us in the past, but may not be serving the best purpose in the present. They may not accept your current experience, insight and understanding. They may be stuck in an earlier paradigm that isn’t relevant any more.
We can aim to support them, but not at the cost of our internal core – our lovability, value and worth. There may be times when we lovingly release those that may have served in the past, but do not any more. Or we can take a break from them and surround ourselves with the attributes and attitudes that we need and want to raise ourselves even higher – and figure out whether they fit in the ‘top 5’ later on. Sometimes our advancement allows us to see others in a new light.
We may also find ourselves a part of several tribes. Who says we always have to be with one? It may require more attention and coordination, but participating in several tribes that encourage us to use our gifts may take up less energy than going it alone, or being a part of one group that works against our greater good.
Usually our most supportive tribes start with our getting clear on the general direction we’d like to be headed in… greater physical health?… more skills in a particular area?… deeper connections to others or ourselves? It doesn’t really matter what it is, as long as it is something that you ‘do’ want, not what you don’t (remember, the subconscious doesn’t hear “don’t”, so you want to turn it in the way you want to go, not from where you’re moving away)
Take a few minutes, when you have time, to close your eyes and consider what your ideal tribe/friends/connections possess. Add emotions to it, to make it subconscious attracting, and enjoy. The deeper part of mind takes our imagination as an advanced signal that can light our way – so that we start noticing these elements and entities in our everyday life.
Connecting with the right tribe for us can benefit us in ways that we may not get on our own. Membership can have its privileges!
If you’ve already found your tribe – congratulations. If you need help in searching for, shifting or tweaking your tribe-finding abilities, hypnosis can help. Contact me to discover how the subconscious can help you direct yourself for your best life/tribe yet.
PS – people who are interested in or use the subconscious mind to make changes is a wonderful tribe of people who learn to appreciate their powers within to do, be and feel better – you’re in good company!